Crazy orders HP calculation

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In the final battle against crazy hand in crazy orders, player HP is based on damage taken and the hand's HP is based on the number of turns. But how does this work, exactly? Particularly, for player HP:
- What is the ratio between damage and HP?
- Does healed damage count towards the total?
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Calculate your pet's HP with my 100% legitimate formula | Unraveled
Sources: Stack Exchange - This article follows the attribution requirements of Stack Exchange and is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.
Images: Pavel Danilyuk, imustbedead, Elīna Arāja, Nina Uhlíková